Friday, March 24, 2017

Stay Active! (echewing the passive voice)


We’ve previously looked at advice from William Strunk Jr.’s Elements of Style. In this post, we review Section 10 in which he advises writers to Use the active voice.

More Direct, More Vigorous

Strunk’s first reason to write actively is that, “The active voice is usually more direct and vigorous than the passive.” Compare the following:

    I shall always remember my first visit to Boston.

   My first visit to Boston will always be remembered by me.


The first sentence is much better and more direct while the second which is less direct, less bold, and less concise. Removing "by me" makes the second sentence more concise -

    My first visit to Boston will always be remembered,

- but the action is less defined. Is the writer, some person undisclosed or the world remembering this visit? It isn’t clear.

Lively and Emphatic Writing
According to Strunk, “The habitual use of the active voice makes for forcible writing. This is true not only in narrative principally concerned with action, but in writing of any kind. Many a tame sentence of description or exposition can be made lively and emphatic by substituting a verb in the active voice for some such perfunctory expression as ‘there is’, or ‘could be heard’.”

    There were a great number of dead leaves lying on the ground.

    Dead leaves covered the ground.

    The sound of a guitar somewhere in the house could be heard.

    Somewhere in the house a guitar hummed sleepily.


Taking Away a Verb’s Function
In the following examples, the noun expresses the entire action. The verb then has no other job except to complete the sentence.

    A survey of this region was made in 1900.

    This region was surveyed in 1900.


A Passive Dependent on Another Passive
Strunk warns against making one passive verb dependent on another passive verb:

    Gold was not allowed to be exported.

    It was forbidden to export gold (The export of gold was prohibited).

 

Before the correction, the word that is related to the second passive verb is the subject of the first.

Don’t Abandon it Completely
However, Strunk does not advise writers to eliminate the passive voice completely. Using it is convenient and sometimes necessary, as these examples show:

    The dramatists of the Restoration are little esteemed to-day.

    Modern readers have little esteem for the dramatists of the Restoration.


The first sentence focuses on the dramatists of the Restoration while the second focuses on the tastes of modern readers. In these examples the subject of the sentence determines which voice is used.

Keep it Active
Taking Strunk’s advice, we should always try to use the active voice over the passive voice whenever possible.